Destination Wedding Rules, #1

Destination Wedding Rule #1: Give your guests time to do as they wish. A couple planned events & gatherings are good, but make sure to leave at least 8 hours of "free to be" time. This will allow your friends and family to make your wedding celebration a truly unique experience.

The best video intro I've ever seen.

Seriously, this is so cute I can't stand it. I just wish I had thought of it 1st. I adore working with Ashley & Sam for 2 reasons: Pure talent and awesome people. We had a blast with them at Writer Bride's wedding, Ladies and gentlemen,

Create a back up plan that's as good as your fair weather plan

As much as I would love to live in the land of denial, sometimes it rains. Wedding planning 101 teaches: have a back up plan. Having an alternate ceremony location is not a back up plan. It's a big bold note at the top, yes. But that's it. Basically, your back up plan needs to be an exact duplicate of your fair weather plans, only with all the alternatives laid into place. There's more to it than where you'll ceremony will be if it's too hot & humid or cold and windy outside. A great back up plan is plans for a the wedding you would have loved to have inside. Not a compromise. Just a short list to get you thinking...

} Are you still able to have your formal photos in the same locations?
} Are the new locations going to cross paths with guests before the ceremony?
} Are you going to run into another wedding party?
} Are your guests going to get mixed up with another bride's guests?
} Is it going to take longer to transport all your guests, meaning that some elements will start later, and you'll need to extend end times?
} If it's too windy, will your amazing, totally unique, omg-I-can't-wait-to-see-it escort card display still work? And where will it go if it's inside?
} Do you have umbrellas ready to go? How will they be displayed and who's going to be responsible for them?
} Are the perfect apple green sheer overlays the same color inside the ballroom?
} Who will update all your vendors on all the changes?
} How will your guests know where to go to?
} How late can you order the heaters, and where do you want them placed?
} Does the rain plan cost more money? ick.

Back up plans are a puzzle - make sure yours has all the pieces in the box and they all fit together. Start with the flat edges, and work your way into the details! Gang, don't think for a minute this is a list of all the questions that need answered. Remember, its all about making sure there are no loop holes. That's what makes your wedding day smooth and seamless so that you have nothin' but love and fun celebrating the day away. If you invest the time into planning for ill weather, you can rest easy that you're having a fantastic wedding no matter what.
Oh, and do this way way way before wedding day. Better yet, call your planner and let her/him figure it all out, and don't think about it again.

How a wedding planner is a financial investmentand a giveaway too!

Anyone can tell you easily that having a wedding planner just makes things easier. Obviously, that's probably one of the main reasons you're considering having one. That's because before you got engaged, you already had a pretty full schedule. Adding a +200 hour project to your plate is probably not going to fit in easily. Well, maybe it would if you could plan it one hour a day for six and a half months. Not possible; wouldn't that be something though?

Okay, so besides the time saved, let's talk a bit about some things that are a benefit financially. I always get asked,

"Exactly how can you save me money?"

My answer is the same,

"I can't guarantee any specific savings, but I can tell you some things that seem to be pretty consistent"

With that said...
1. Wedding planners, especially those who also do design work, often have "stuff". Stuff left from previous weddings. What does that mean to you? That means that the rehearsal dinner and/or welcome reception (that you forgot to budget decor for- oops) might actually turn out to be amazing because your wedding planner happens to have some custom linens that a previous bride didn't want, a dozen very cool lanterns that would make perfect centerpieces, about 100 luminaries to light the path. So when interviewing your potential wedding planner, ask if she has "stuff"! Note: I am in no way saying that you should only hire a planner who has "stuff". It's just a nice little budget booster if she/he does.

2. Wedding planners know the key to contracts is not the fine print, it's the missing print. Everyone knows to read the fine print. If you don't know what is missing, you don't know what you'll be paying for later down the road. It's a planners responsibility to draw your attention to these things. Example: Let's say you are having an outdoor welcome reception in the evening. An event for which you are paying a $500 site fee. Your contract says that this includes the space, chairs, tables, linen, set-up and breakdown. Sounds all inclusive right? Wrong. There's a list of at least six things that I can think of off the top of my head that you are going to need for this event. And nope, they aren't free. So what is going to happen? A couple weeks before the event, you'll get a call from your venue saying,

"Did you want to get _____? Because you're going to need it. Yes, we can provide it at a cost of $$$$$"

Every professional planner should be able to do this for you.

3. Your wedding planner knows when to call it a night. How many weddings do you go to a year? Your wedding planner goes to lots of them. Because we've experienced it so many times, we can tell when your guests have just about had all the fun they can. So when you've been able to enjoy all the champagne, and you're having a great time on the dance floor, we're watching the door, and who is walking out of it- we know what the sign is. The time has come when we walk up to you and say, it's time for the last dance per your contracted end time. Well, you're still having a great time, and you turn around and see there are still 30 people having a great time. So perhaps you say,

"No way wedding planner, we're still having a great time, look at the dance floor!"

It's at this moment that we're going to save you $$$$. Because we've seen "the sign", and know that the cost for you to add on that additional hour to the bar, band, and venue is going to be $$$$ for just an hour. And if you were to extend that hour, within 15 minutes, there will only be 8 people left. So basically what it comes down to is that we're not going to let you make a rash decision that will cost you a great deal money that you could be spending extending your honeymoon 3 days instead! So drink your champagne, we'll watch your back (and your wallet!).

4. Myth: Super small or "intimate weddings" (under 20 guests) don't need wedding planners. Myth with a capital M. While many people are having small weddings because they like the intimacy of it, many people are doing it because it is just so much less expensive. Here's what I can say- it's the small weddings that planners are often able to get the best deals for their clients. It's these weddings where we can pull from different resources that we can't do for larger events. Why? Just one reason: because we can do so much of the work ourselves instead of having to outsource. This is just one reason, but boy do I have a list for this one!

5. Believe it or not, not all the really good and well priced vendors are where you are looking for vendors. An established wedding planner knows many many professionals, beyond the current popularity list. You're going to have to trust us on this one- but this is usually the Ace!

This is just a short list of benefits, but I thought it would be a good time to share this kind of information.

How about I save you $5 right now? Send a comment, and we'll draw 3 names to send the current issue of Destination Weddings & Honeymoons to! I'll announce the winners on Thursday.

Favors. Sometimes good, sometimes hideous junk I wish had never graced a table.

These mini Key Lime pies were the favor each guest received when reboarding Lady Chadwick. Captivapalooza brides welcome luncheon included a cruise Cabbage Key. As you might imagine, they were quite the hit!

Yesterday I spent some time on the phone with Lucky Bride talking about almost everything under the sun. Mostly because we have just a few weeks left and there's lots left to do. Also because she's just fun to talk to and if you caught my twitter yesterday, it was for sure a procrastination day.
Anyhoo...
So the topic of favors came up. I'm on the fence when it comes to favors. This is totally my personal opinion on them. Do you need them? Nope. Are they nice? Yes, they're nice, if they aren't, ummm, junk. Sorry, no other way to put it.

Here's the thing. If you can't eat it, or use it- don't do it. Put yourself in your guests shoes. Do you want a candle with somebody's name and wedding date on it? Are you seriously going to display that in your house? Doubt it. And if you're having a destination wedding- for goodness sakes remember your guests have to pack this stuff up and get it home.

I must confess, I did this at my wedding and looking back now, oh I am so embarrassed. I'd show you a picture of the tulle wrapped mini pot, but I can't bring myself to do it.

So if you do want to give your guest a favor, give them something they can eat right after the wedding (i.e. cookies, chocolate/candies, donuts, popcorn, coffee) or give them something they will use (i.e. beer/soda koozie, flip flops, stamped postcard & pen). Interactive favors are also great. They are truly my favorite because they create another active memory for the evening. Interactive favors are things like candy buffets, photobooths, donut stations, etc.
Have a cool favor idea? Click the comment link below and tell us all about it.

5 reasons to get wedding video

I am forever telling clients to get wedding video. First response: I'll never watch it. I'll bet you $10 bucks you will. And even if you only did watch it once, you will be so glad you have it. 2nd response: They're cheesy. Not anymore they aren't. In the 80's and 90's, yep, they were bad. Now though- holy cow. The cheese has left the building. Technology has caught up and boy is there a huge difference. 3rd response: They annoying and they follow you around with that bright light, and the interviews are stupid. First question I hear post wedding, "Was the videographer there? When do we get the video?" Every single time. So much for obtrusive and bright lights responses. Ha!

Here are the top 4 pieces of feedback/favorite things I get from clients who do get wedding videography:
1. Getting to hear dad's/Best mans toast one more time is priceless.
2. Actually seeing and hearing how excited groom/bride was just before leaving to walk down the aisle.
3. Hearing us take our vows, because we don't even remember it, it happened so fast.
4. Seeing myself walk down the aisle and the actual progression of groom seeing me.
5. Watching everyone party on the dance floor together. Friends and family, the music makes all the difference.

And on the other end, there are the others who will want to see it. Think ahead. First hand I can say that if you have kids, the night you break out your wedding video is bound to be a family movie night that you will never forget. I know my kids haven't stopped laughing yet. We might have to break ours out again tonight come to think of it.

So anyway, yes, Arnie from A/R Video sent me Sugar Brides wedding video this week. They had a tradtional Jewish wedding that incorporated nearly all of the Jewish wedding customs and traditions into their day. Because the Tish, Veiling and Ketubah signing happened privately, while the wedding guests are being seated for the ceremony, I didn't get to see attend these events. I was so excited to see how wonderfully they turned out! Hearing everything their families had to say was just awesome. Everyone was so excited.

Here are links to some highlight clips of our weddings that a couple great videographers sent out way.
They're directors cuts (mini highlight videos online):
Donna & Jim
by First Sight Pictures
Sarah & Ben
by Luxe Films
and also
Vanessa & Greg
Jenn & John
Melissa & Chad
Julie & Phil
all by AMC Video

The short story of the Ugly Bouquet

At 2pm my cell rang,

"Kelly, its Jamie (Florida brides sister/Matron of Honor). We have a flower emergency. Bring whatever you've got."

That sounds pretty bad right? Yeah, I thought so too. So I grabbed the bucket of roses I had for the aisle presentation, my ER kit and some shears and I hightailed it up to the bridal suite. I almost passed out in horror at the sight of what I saw before me (slight exaggeration). This is what she pulled out of the florists box:This picture does no justice on how awful and pathetic looking it really was in person. The roses weren't open, the stems weren't cut trimmed, the ribbon was that cheap crunchy white stuff- I could go on and on, but I promised a short story.
Here's a picture of Florida bride had actually asked for (less the feathers): A round bouquet of Anna roses with white double faced satin ribbon and reminants of her moms wedding dress tied in:photo by Julie Goodacre
Yeah. I see a little bit of a difference between the two.
So off to work I went. I have never ever been so happy that I had watched the Martha Stewart Wedding DVD Series. THANK YOU MARTHA! I made Florida Brides bouquet from scratch with the roses we pulled from the petal aisle stash and then gave the bridesmaids bouquet making 101 and we remade all 6 of their bouquets as well. Here is how they all turned out:


Want to see more photos from Florida Brides wedding? Check out Mike's work at the impressions photography blog.

Dear Kelly, I want to be a wedding planner.How do I do it?

I get this email every single day. I'm really quite flattered by it to be honest. So, thanks for asking, it makes me smile. This answer is NOT for everyone. I guarantee there is going to be someone who thinks that this is the stupidest answer ever. Hopefully though, it will mean something good to someone out there.

Hi, my name is ______, I'm a 20 year undergrad at University of _____, and am addicted to your blog. As a young college student, the question of my career path has come up quite often, and with much research and thought, the one job that constantly is in the back of my mind is wedding and event planner. Ive had my hand in planning a few events and parties, and loved every tiny detail. I'm originally from _________, and with a large high end mall, and many gated communities popping up on the west side of the city, I'm wondering if soon would be the time for someone like me to start up something and see if the city can support it. It's been slightly frustrating as every search for "Becoming a wedding/event planner" comes up with results of online courses/ guide books... and finally your blog, and many other wonderful sites like junebug and weddingbee. I don't think for a second I could make a website, open doors and succeed, none the less have a clue what I'm doing and would rather do this right to make a career, and not a failed attempt :) Ive contacted a few local businesses but am not receiving the friendly response I'd expected and don't know if this is due to my approach. I'm wondering if I could throw a few questions your way, and maybe get some advice on how to approach this subject. Thank you so much for your time, and I really appreciate anything you'd be willing to offer.

My response:

Hi ______,
Thanks for reading my blog! I understand your frustration. I was there once myself. The reason you aren't getting a great response from the local wedding industry is probably one of two things. Either you're contacting them during wedding season when they are all extremely busy and can't deal with someone calling on them for help at the moment, or (and more likely), they are afraid of helping the competition.
Are you at a school that has a Hospitality & Resort Management major? If not, that might be your 1st big decision...that's where you need to head to. If you are looking to get a small business degree and use that as your foundation- then stay put and start learning events from a different angle. If you can't find a wedding planner who will let you come on as an intern, look for internships with photographers, florists, wedding cake bakers, and videographers. Photographers and Videographers are your best bet so that you can actually attend as many weddings as possible. You'll also want to get a job in sales and catering at a local resort. I say resort and not country club because a resort will allow you to hold several positions outside of food and beverage that you can learn from and use in your career as a wedding planner.
I want to tell you that you are 100% doing the right thing...look for the areas that are growing and are going to need a wedding planner in the next couple years. Get in while nobody else is there so that when it does "boom"- you are it. In other words, learn how to plan in a market that has already been built, and then open shop in a market that shows signs of becoming big.
Best wishes to you _______- let me know how it goes!

Here's the thing gang. It is HARD and I mean really hard to be a wedding planner. I am not even going to try and deny that. Is it fun? Yes. I love it. I am totally addicted. When I talk to a bride and I say, "I am so excited!" I am not kidding- I really am. You have to have a passion for it. A passion for planning your own wedding does not mean you will have the passion to plan 15 weddings at the same time, with 15 different personalities, tastes, and styles. And if you're going to do this for a career, that's what you have to plan on doing. Also, you have to be prepared to work your arse off. I work a minimum of 60 hours a week, and during our wedding seasons, there are weeks on end where I don't get a day off and I work 14 hour days 3 weeks straight. Why do wedding planners have to work so much? Because on top of the weddings that we're planning, It's a business that has to be run. Accounting, marketing, public relations, administrative- it's a long list. I so wish that there was a wedding tv show that showed what this job is really like. I think so many people would be surprised.
Is it worth it? Absolutely! I LOVE BEING A WEDDING PLANNER. And _____, I hope that you will love being a wedding planner too.

P.S. For those ready to pick up the phone and call a bunch of wedding pro's and ask for internships- don't. Check their websites first to see if they have a preferred method of contact for such inquiries. I pick all my interns via email.

My favorite reception timelineThe Celebration Timeline

The thing is, there are so many hundreds of ways to have your reception run. And while no 2 weddings are even remotely similar, and this timelime will not work for every wedding, I do have this one particular timeline that I love to use when possible.

Dare I spill my guts? I vote yes. Before I tell you though, I want to explain why. I developed this particular timeline after:
1. Experiencing so many weddings where the guests (especially the bride & groom) just were not ready for the party to end because the dinner portion of the evening took up so much of the time that the reception included.
2. Another never ending issue- having to get all the traditions packed in before the photographer & videographer left, without rushing through them.
3. Breaking up a packed dance floor 4 times in an hour to do one of the traditions.
4. Do you like to be interrupted 4 times during a nice dinner out with all your friends? No? Me Either. So why do it at your wedding? Stop the constant flow of interruptions!

Let me say this though; most of my awesome and amazing clients (yep, they ROCK. Every last one of them) don't do every wedding tradition. Bouquet tosses and garter tosses are few and far between. Same goes for big exits. So like I said- this timeline isn't for everyone. But it works quite a bit for us! If you do use it, let me know how it goes.

Guests seated
Newlyweds introduced
Newlyweds welcome & thank guests
Father of the bride toast
Best Man & Maid of honor toasts
1st course
Cake Cutting (guests remain seated, have the cake somewhere everyone can see it or roll it in)
2nd course
3rd course (cake)
Call guests to dance floor for 1st dance
The special All Guest dance (VERY IMPORTANT)
First break for slow song - 2nd dances (let your music professional make the call on when this should happen- they know how to read the crowd).

Notice this- all the traditions are done by the 1st slow song and because you did the all party song immediately after your 1st dance, the photographer and videographer caught video of everyone on the dance floor.
Yeah, you see why I love this timeline?

Before & After: From Idea to RealityP.S. I Can't draw

Today I'm cleaning out my office (ugh) and I find some old drawings and photos. It's amazing what they eventually developed into:
This:
Became:

This:

Became:


This:
Became:

This:
Became:
Obviously we made some changes...but it's neat to see what developed huh?

How big should my band be?

Here's a good question I got today.

Is there such thing as a band that's too big?

Yes there most certainly is. One easy way to know if you've gone a bit too far- if the stage will have to be bigger than the dancefloor to fit the band...it's too big. If you want a true live band experience, I vote for nothing less than 3 pieces. After that, another piece per 20-25 (starting with 3 pieces and 75 guests)people is a good rule of thumb.

Some things to keep in mind though:

Typically what makes that big band sound is a horn section. And that usually requires a 5 to 6 piece band.
The other element that makes a huge difference in not only the sound, but also the playlist- having a female vocalist.

Onsite coordinators vs. Independent PlannersExplaining the HUGE difference

I had 12 minutes before my clients were due to arrive at the florist on Friday, so I was really excited to take advantage of the time and read the new In Style Weddings. It's a great magazine, and their new wedding website is supposed to be launching soon. Anyhoo, I get to the etiquette secion and here's what I read,

"I'm having a destination wedding at a venue that employs an in-house planner, and she hasn't consulted me on some decisions. How should I handle this?"

While the answer given was good, it was very much incomplete. Here's why; the answer didn't explain that perhaps what the bride was expecting the planner to do, wasn't at all her job. You see, an onsite (or in-house) planner is typically only responsible for things that happen onsite and that are relative to the site and its staff- and NOTHING else.
So, then what's the difference? I'm going to clear this up once and for all. The best way to find out what exactly your "included" planner will do...ask. Here are a few really good questions. And yes, the crazy seeming ones, I have actually had to do.
"Hello Onsite Planner (insert name here)! I have a few questions for you. Yes or no answers please."

"Will you...

1. Call all the vendors on your preferred vendors list and see if they are available for my wedding and in my budget? And if not, will you get me 3 more options who are?
2. Create a budget for me for everything wedding day related?
3. Write and hand out both wedding party and guest list itineraries?
4. Compile all the goodies for the welcome bags and make sure all the hotels get them just before guests arrive?
5. Give me stationary and etiquette advice?
6. Keep my mother at the cocktail hour, far from me during photos, with a full gin and tonic and away from crazy Uncle Steve?
7. Schedule and attend all the vendor meetings with me?
8. Review all the contracts I'll have to sign?
9. Prepare a detailed timeline for my day as well as one for all the vendors working at my wedding?
10. Go out and find my new father-n-law size 12.5 brown leather lace free yet wedding appropriate shoes when his sole falls off during the ceremony and make sure that you're back in time for him to be introduced into the dinner reception?
11. Call and confirm all the vendors have been paid, are going to show up, if they need anything further, and that they do in fact know not to say anything about the surprise grooms cake.
12. Find a replacement tuxedo for the best man the morning of the wedding when it arrives blue and not black?
13. Help me create design options for my wedding?
14. Research and find favors, a unique escort card display and super cool fun things for my guests to do at my wedding?
15. Help me plan a welcome reception, grooms outing, bridesmaids luncheon, and rehearsal dinner? Oh, and a farewell brunch too? Oh, but not all at your site of course.
16. Figure out all the rentals I'll need, order them, and then oversee the installation?
17. Stay for the entire wedding and then check under every single table for lost shoes and purses after everyone leaves?
18. Run the rehearsal?
19. Email me when you find flip flops on clearance at Old Navy and then fight with them until they agree to send all 775 to you, even if it does clean out their stock?
20. Have an emergency kit prepared for me and my bridesmaids?
21. Make sure there are hsopitality baskets in the restrooms?
22. Politely explain to the make-up artist that my eyes look ridiculous so I don't have to feel awkward?"

Here is one thing I want to make perfectly clear- onsite planners or coordinators are wonderful and very helpful and are responsible for an enormous amount of work that you will never even realize. I just feel that its important to know that what an independent wedding planner such as myself does, is not what 95% of onsite planners do...2 different job descriptions. Picture above, me and Jen Dube (onsite planner for Casa Ybel- and she rocks.)

Oh, and the 775 flip flops- the UPS guy thought he had seen it all until that delivery. And my husband, well, he "pointed out the 17 boxes in my living room" every day until we were down to 12 boxes. Now, "Remember when we had 775 flip flops? The 600 left seem like nothing huh?"

Sit outside the circle

One of the 1st things you'll notice at most reception venues you go to is the standard 60 to 72 inch round table. It's been considered "wedding norm" for what seems like ages. They are classic, and are very easy to dress. And they are wonderful for filling a room that is too big. I don't have anything against the round tables, but I think you should explore your options because these days, the possibilities are endless.

I take that back about the big round table; I do have some issues. My biggest issue is that you don't get to talk to more than 1 person at a time. You have the person on your left, and your right. And if you're talking to the person on your left, then you have your back to the person on your right. Imagine being that poor person on your right if the person on their left is talking to the person on their left? That's right...total awkwardness. Ok, dramatic- I know. But its true and you know it. Also, can you think of the last time you sat at one of these big round tables and talked to the people on the other side of the table? Nope, probably not, because its about near impossible without feeling like you're having to yell across the table. So, let's see, total conversation possibility: 0 to 2.


So now that I have you interested in other types of seating, let me give you some fabo ideas:
Long banquet tables. Great things about this style of seating! You can easily talk to the 3 people in front of you because they're right in front of you, not five to 6 feet away. You can also talk to the person on your left or right.
Total conversation possibility: 3 to 5 Even better, long tables mean more guests at one table. Less tables = less centerpieces. Less centerpieces = budget savings. That's right, stuff that moola back in your pocket for a pina colada by the pool on your honeymoon.
Casual outdoor wedding, rehearsal dinner, or brunch? How about picnic tables (with linens & market umbrellas? Don't believe me that this could possibly look nice? Check this photo out. This was an amazing rehearsal dinner.

Another great one, check out page 152 (and the back cover)in Simply Stunning Weddings by Karen Bussen.

Other neat seating ideas:
Square tables with 8 seats each (modern, contemporary)
Cabaret tables with 4-6 seats each (very 1920's. Also looks amazing around a pool)

A call today

"Hello, is this Kelly McWilliams?

"Yes, this is Kelly."

"Are you really a wedding planner or do you just fake it for your blog?"

Totally confused, I hesitated and then responded,

"Yes. Are you really calling Weddings by Socialites and wondering?"

And then I started laughing. I couldn't help it. I know, not very professional, but it was just so funny the way she asked. Thankfully, she started laughing too.

So for those who may also be confused; yes, I am a real wedding planner. I plan about 15 real weddings a year, start to finish. I could do more, but it wouldn't be as fun. I enjoy the time I get to put in with my clients and their celebrations.

I know you're reading, and yes, I'll be calling you the crazy question bride until the day we get you get married. Looking forward to lots more laughs in the meantime

Photo: That's me with Erika who got married on New Years Eve '06..at her wedding...that I planned for real. HA!

Ceremony & Reception Sites: Don't be so quick to rule it out!

Often, I'll find that brides & grooms are quick to rule out locations because they see it one way and can't imagine it looking like anything else- most importantly- they way that they want it to look. Looks can be so deceiving.



To provide an example, I called Cynthia at LaPlaya Resort in Naples and asked her to send me a bunch of wedding pictures of the same sites- different weddings. The above beach ceremonies are on the same stretch of beach- 2 totally different vibes.



One casual seaside wedding, one semi-formal seaside wedding




Yep that's the same room. 3 very different events! Quick note (there was a carpet change between 2 of these photos)
Like LaPlaya? I do to. To get more info on having your wedding at LaPlaya Beach Resort in Naples, call Cynthia O'Brien at (239)598-5706

The Wedding Books

Very often I get asked about where to look for ideas. The magazines are great of course. They keep up with the trends and are usually good about providing the resources. What I love the best though are the wedding books. I'm pretty sure I've blogged about them in the past, but we'll re-visit. The great thing about the wedding books is that you're getting a more complete picture on how the elements are used in the wedding. In a magazine, there may be a spread on invitations that run the gammot from tradtional to ultra modern, but rarely do you see what those invitations translate to a few months down the line at the actual event they were created for. And that is why I just love the wedding books. Here is my current top 10 list (in no order). These are the ones that I have pulled out many times over to complete a "
What if?" or "Could I?" thought.

To have and to hold by David Stark & Avi Adler
Southern Weddings by Tara Guerard
Simple Stunning Weddings by Karen Bussen
Extraordinary Weddings and Weddings by Colin Cowie
Signature Weddings by Michelle Rago
InStyle Weddings and InStyle Parties by the publishers of InStyle Magazines
Fantasy Weddings, Inspirations, and Design for Entertaining by Preston Bailey
The best of Martha Stewart Weddings by Martha Stewart
The Party Planner by David Tutera
Party Confidential by Lara Shriftman and Elizabeth Harrison



Ok, I have issues sticking to just 10 obviously. All these books are available on Amazon and usually they are available at a discounted price.
Happy Reading!
Do you have a favorite I don't know about?

Wondering what to put in the welcome bags?

A wedding planner friend of mine asked the other day about what I put in welcome bags. I've never put 2 of the same together. Just as each wedding is unique, so are the bags. First of all, I don't always use a bag. Sometimes we use a box, sometimes a basket, even a bath robe we used once (it looked really neat).

There are a few staples that go inside:
Bottled Water, Map, Brochures, and guest itinerary

Then there are the things that are unique to your wedding. Here are some of my favorites:
Stewart sodas or those fancy lemonades- can't remember the name, wine & opener (or a champagne split) with 2 glasses, pashminas, parasols, flip flops, beach towels, koozies, regional magazines, sunscreen wipes, chips/pretzels/popcorn, local food goodies, candy, cookies (photo cookies are huge hits), battery powered fans, off! wipes, pre-stamped postcards & pens, room key chains (those kind that go on your wrist), drink tickets (pina colada by the pool?),spa gift certificates, scented candles, cd's of your favorite songs, robe & slippers...

I could go on, but this is a good start right? Oh- and don't go thinking you need to put all this in there! The most important thing is that your guest who is spending 2 days travelling and maybe $1000 or more to attend your celebration feels welcomed. Put in what you like and what your budget affords you. These gifts can range from $7 to $175 each, depending on how lavish you want to get.

Quick tip: If you can attach a personal note to each bag- it speaks volumes. And its a task you can start as soon as the RSVP comes in. Also, if you do a welcome bag for each guest, a favor a the reception is certainly not necessary.

Didn't hit your minimum?

Most venues require that you spend a minimum amount of Food & beverage in order to retain your function space. What happens if you book the space thinking that for sure you're going to have 80 guests and then when all the RSVP's come back you only have 72? Hopefully you've set up your RSVP's to come back early enough that you can still decrease your guest count without a penalty (read the fine print!). So let's say your price per person is $160, and that price includes 4 passed items and a 3 course dinner. Suddenly, you have $1280 that you have to pay to the venue, no matter what. Well, rather than lose it- spend it! Add something extravagant that you only didn't order because of the additional cost. How about a sushi bar? Maybe a fresh donut station? Ooooh- a lobster tail to each plate? How about making that 3 course 4, add an intermezzo of sorbet, a champagne toast served to each guest with a strawberry, Dark and White Chocolate fountains...oh the possibilities!

The interview. The whole interview. And nothing but the interview.

Several months ago I was interviewed by Budget Travel Magazine Online. The article turned out really well. I was extremely happy about how close it was to what I actually said. That's rarely the case. I was even happier when they used the same interview for their CNN segment and still stuck to what I said. There were a few things that I mentioned in the original interview that were left out though, and I think they could be helpful to anyone planning a destination wedding. So with that said, here's a link to the entire interview.

Consulting with the floral designer

So you're ready to go to the florist and pick out your wedding flowers! Very exciting. Me, I love the floral consultation. It's the meeting where it all seems to come together. Often, brides go to these consultations with an open mind, and pictures they ripped out of the magazines. If you want to make the most out of your consultation- go prepared! Take the time before your consultation to flip through wedding amagazines and books, browse the wedding websites, and look for things you like and don't like. Take what you can: rip-outs, print outs, swatches, pictures of the sites you'll be marrying in and where the reception will take place, etc. It's not necessarily that you want to duplicate those photos; its so that the floral designer can get a sense of your style. Oh make sure that you bring a picture of your dress- it helps the designer offer his or her best suggestion for bouquet style and size.
And don't hesitate to walk in there with Preston Bailey's Fantasy Weddingsor Colin Cowie's Extraordinary Weddings or Southern Weddings (my personal favorites and I think must reads for the bride who wants it all). Even though you may not have the budgets to pull some of those looks off- your designer might be able to offer suggestions to get you close to that point without breaking the bank.