A Simple Destination Wedding

Until recently, we thought that everyone had the same idea when it comes to a destination wedding. A small group (i.e., less than 50) of friends and family join you for your special day and then you celebrate afterwards.

However, we found a YouTube video (below) for simple destination weddings (hat tip to LaQuinta South Padre Island, Texas). Slowly, it dawned on us that there is a market out there for very, very, very simple destination weddings. OK, we’re a bit appalled that the minister didn’t really have the bride and groom’s names nailed and seemed to stumble through the ceremony, but maybe that’s what this couple wanted.

In our book, this qualifies more as an elopement than a true destination wedding. However, we post it here because as we researched our own destination wedding, many resorts sold this kind of a wedding as a “destination wedding.”

Frankly, some were even worse…offering only a tape recorded ceremony that is played back with the appropriate pauses for the bride and groom to announce their names, etc. We find these kind of Vegas-esque “ceremonies” to be ghastly and appalling. And yet there is a market out there for them.

So... the whole point of this posting is to be sure you really investigate that you are getting the kind of destination wedding you want. Don’t assume that the terminology means the same thing to everyone. Ask probing questions. And, if at all possible, try to do a visit of your destination in advance and observe someone else’s wedding.

This simple destination wedding could be what you are getting:

A Wedding Gift

In this age of couple’s paying for their own weddings, you don’t have a lot of excess money. We had agreed on not buying each other a present for our actual wedding day. One of us lived up to that agreement…

Mr. groom thought a surprise gift would make his bride happy. He brought (and snuck in his luggage) a beautiful pair of black Tahitian pearl earrings from Nordstrom’s for a wedding day surprise.

Doing something nice for each other on your wedding day is important! Even if it is a card, you should do something to start your new lives off on the right foot. It doesn’t have to be expensive, just meaningful.

Bridal Processional Music

In the past, your choice of processional music was Mendelssohn’s Wedding March and Wagner’s Bridal Chorus.

These days, tastes have changed. You have many more options than you used to. More contemporary music choices include:

• Pachelbel’s Canon
• Delibes’ Flower Duet
• Verdi’s March (from Aida)
• Vivaldi Spring (from the Four Seasons)
• Handel’s Hornpipe (from the Water Music Suite)
• Beethoven’s Ode to Joy
• Bach’s Air on the G String

Now, if you have a destination wedding, you may or may not have a procession or music. This is something you need to consider and work trough.

For us, music was very important. We hired a local violinist to play for about a half-hour before the ceremony and about 10 minutes after.

Reception Seating Anxiety

There are few things that can cause more drama and angst than seating arrangements for the wedding reception. It’s a balancing act that can require tact, diplomacy and hard choices—especially if you have family drama.

We’ve seen a number of approaches that have worked well. If it is a larger sized wedding, you can assign guests to a table and then let them chose their own seats. If you have a mid-size wedding, you might assign seats at all the tables.

For us, we selected one very large family-size table (for about 20 people), but had reserved seating and name cards for the guests to find their assigned seats. This mixed up our families (and ensured the bride’s parents, no divorced, were not seated together).

Image source: http://www.imagebridal.com/starfish.html

Wedding Flowers for Destination Weddings

Flowers can easily be one of the most expensive and headache-inducing parts of the wedding. It's not just a question of what kind and how many, but what's in season, what will last the length of the ceremony or reception, what's right for the location and more.

More often than not, having a destination wedding makes these questions a little bit simpler because most of the decoration and ambiance comes from the location. The other good (maybe?) news is that certain flowers are extremely difficult to get in the islands, so your choices are narrowed for you. Plus, there are typically a wide variety of beautiful indigenous flowers available, so you can incorporate the flavor of your location relatively inexpensively.

For our wedding, we spent numerous hours combing through photos on The Knot and elsewhere looking for beautiful bouquets that incorporated a little bit of blue to fit with the color of the wedding. In the end, we decided that nothing was completely perfect but it was all likely to turn out well anyway. We gave a few pictures to the wedding planner and crossed her fingers. Once again, the planner came through with two beautiful bouquets for the bride and maid of honor and lovely boutonnieres as well.

For people having a destination wedding in the US, there are nearly unlimited options for variety, price and number of flowers. Two relatively simple and budget-conscious options are Costco and Proflowers.com. Most people think of bulk mayonnaise and giant vats of tomato sauce when they think of Costco, but the truth is that the warehouse chain has slowly but surely been becoming more upscale, and the flowers are quite beautiful (they even offer bulk and special occasion options). Proflowers offers an even wider assortment of colors and varieties for bouquets and centerpieces. If the quality is at all comparable to their normal flower service, they're likely to be very nice.

Destination Wedding Make-up

One of the biggest fears have is not looking absolutely perfect on their wedding day. Given the nature of destination weddings, most brides don't have a professional there to do their makeup for them.

In this case, you have a few options—

1. You can find a spa or salon in your destination location. Since you are not from the area, you will have to judge the quality sight unseen. And if it is in a resort location, this can be a very expensive option.


2. You could fly in your favorite makeup artist to do you up! This will guarantee the quality...and a rather large expense.


3. Or you can do the do-it-yourself approach. For this, you should seek out a professional consultation several months before going and then practice at home. Most quality department stores and MAC stores will do these consultations for you.

No matter your option, you should remember that water-based makeup looks the best and most natural in your photographs...however it can smear if you cry.

You should probably pick up a range of products before you go—

• Liquid foundation & concealer


• Loose or pressed powder


• Eye shadow


• Waterproof Mascara (especially important if you are a crier)


• Supplies like Lash Curler, brushes, sponges, etc.


• Lipstick


• Gloss


• Lip Pencil
  

When applying the make up, put on a button up shirt first! And when you put on the dress, be sure to put a towel over your face. Be very careful if you add any touch up makeup in your dress. We almost had a disaster spilling lip gloss on the dress...but our photographer came to the rescue and got it out just in time!